feel like i never have time to do anything artistic anymore. even when i wake up early i feel like there’s no time, i don’t really feel inspired in the mornings anyway i’m more of a night-time person. but i feel like i’m falling behind in myself, if that makes any sense and soon all i will be able to draw will be stick figures and boxes. urgh.

yesterday night

was a huge contender for the title of worst night ever. it started out so promising but just turned absolutely hideous. first some drunk guy wouldn’t leave us alone until the bouncer came over and told him to fuck off. then i got into an argument with some other prick because apparently i ‘shouldn’t have tattoos if i’m not going to show them off’ and i ‘overreacted’ when he lifted up my skirt to look at one of my tattoos. i don’t care how fucking stupid you are, you don’t put your hands on someone you barely know, it’s a basic principle. so that turned into a huge argument, i’m not a violent personal in the slightest but i was so drunk and angry and this guy was such an arrogant arsehole, i ended up screaming in his face that if he didn’t get the fuck out of mine, i was going to knock him out. so that was classy.

then i realised that somewhere in the scrap i’d been that livid i must have put my phone down and forgotten to pick it up because it completely vanished. i was so pissed off i burst into tears and spent about two hours looking for it, and i also managed to lose my best mate so i was looking for her and my phone, which i’m guessing some little cunt had pocketed and switched off because it had a full battery when i went out and all calls were going straight to answer phone. i spent most of the time looking like a ridiculous drunken dick with tears streaming down my face, found Rachel she was in drunk arsehole mood and stormed away from me saying i’d left her on her own for two hours. we had a little argument and apologised then everything was fine, but i was so irritated and drunk i sat on the side of the street ripped off my eyelashes and my red wig and called my mum and begged her to pick me up. What a decadent evening.

And to top it off, as we were getting in the car, some drunk munter tried to get in the back with us! i think he thought it was a taxi! so of course i called him every name under the sun hanging out of the window as we drove off with mascara down my cheeks, then left a message on my stolen mobile mainly just consisting of the word ‘cunt’. good times! 

so fucking excited

for download. this summer is going to be amazing, at least if the weather stays like this! just wrote my huge ‘to pack’ list and bought my tent today and a couple of other dload essentials. i still need to get my nails done, bleach my roots and get my extensions put back in, then it’s off to download in two weeks, and when we come back, planning and buying my train tickets and hotel reservations, and putting my holidays in for partying in london! 

time for shower #2 because i still don’t feel clean! excited for my best friend to start her training tomorrow at my work.

ok

this week has kind of sucked because i was hoping my download tickets would have arrived by now but they haven’t, and i haven’t sold a damn thing at work all week which always looks bad when it’s someone who’s been there as long as i have. on the plus side, my best friend the bisc has just finished uni today forevzz and i’ve managed to get her an interview for a job at my place tomorrow! can’t wait to see if she gets it so we can work together kenan and kel style!

i really hope this weather situation clears up because i need it to be nice for download, but deep down i know there’s going to be at least one day of non-stop pounding rain i can feel it in my bones. 

i need to buy

• leopard print wellies
• some kind of waterproof coat that is actually waterproof (my parka clearly proved itself useless last year)
• more green hair dye
• our tent (!)
• maybe a new suitcase